Don't forget to put the seat down...

Warning To The Grammarically Correct: If it just bothered you that I wrote "Grammarically", you may as well leave now because my grammar gets even worse.

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Name:
Location: Land of Runny Noses, Flatulence, Bugs and Plenty of Roads....d

I'm a wife and mom to three boys. I love everything 80's, anything chocolate and loathes politics. I like to run for fun (preferably NOT in the hot, hot sun)....

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Why I Love Mother Nature And Oriental Trading Company....

About a month ago I sent out homemade party invitations for Timmy's 7th birthday party and that is what inspired me to have a carnival theme party:
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I was really worried about how things were going to turn out because...

1.) If it would've rained, I would've been royally screwed.

and

2.) How the heck was I going to run the stands by myself?

In the end the weather was awesome (82 degrees with a nice breeze) and my mom, sister and two brother-in-laws helped me run the six stations. Where was Rich, you ask? Oh... he was busy taking pictures. Unfortunately, he didn't get all of the details that I would've gotten if I were the photographer. So let me show you with the files that I created them on...

I had made little signs on sticks pointing towards the backyard gate (the entrance to the 'carnival')that said:

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Once the kids got to the gate, I had set up a little table. There the kids got an empty bag with 15 tickets inside. I also had set up a raffle to win an inflatable monkey. The raffle tickets looked like this:

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I had made up signs for each game station as well. Here is a sample:

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I also made a couple other signs....

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For the 'concession stand' we had pizza (ordered from our favorite pizza place), corn dogs (pre-made frozen corndogs that I got from the grocery store...you just pop those suckers in the over and voila!), buttered popcorn (the pre-popped kind from the grocery store...I bought small individual popcorn bags and just put some popcorn in each bag), homemade caramel apples (they looked kind of pathetic, but were actually really good) and snowballs (we used the ice shaver that we got at Target a couple of years ago). It was a really simple menu.

Here are some pictures from Timmy's party.

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(and I have to throw in a picture of my very enthusiastic looking mil! lol)
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The prizes the kids won were some cheap things I ordered from Oriental Trading company. I also picked up some ring pops and push pops too from BJs.

All in all it was an excellent day. I would just like to pat myself on the back for actually pulling it off!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Name That Tune...

Can you guess what song Mason is singing?

(Is he freakin' cute or what?!)


The first person to guess correctly can win** a.....uhhhh.....pack of weiners (yes, I mean hotdogs silly!).

**Of course you know that means you would have to give me your address. Do you really want me to know that information? ;)

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

25 Years From Now...

This Made Me Laugh...


----------------------------------------
...and now a word with the Weeners...25 years later...

Christian - "We had a...how do I put this? - pretty normal childhood."

Timmy - "Ha! I just will never be able to eat any hotdogs...ever!"

Christian - "Oh yeah...because of the whole 'weener/weiner' thing...

Mason - "Elmo! Elmo!"

Timmy - "Go ahead Mason....show 'em the Elmo tattoo that I did for you the other day. You know the one that's on your stomache. Do you like how I made Mason's belly button look like Elmo's anus?"

Christian - "Yep and just think, that never would've been possible if Mom never got us that tattoo making kit when we were kids. That's a great thing Mom did for us...."

Timmy - "And then she got us that self-piercing kit. That was pretty cool too."

Mason - "Elmo!"

Christian - "Oh that's right...that until we tried to pierce Mason's Elmo underoos..."

Timmy - "Yeah and Mason was still wearing them..."

Christian - "It's a miracle that he even has four kids..."

Mason - "Elmo! Elmo! Elmo! Elmo!"

Christian - "Yep...all named Elmo...."

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

And The Answer To Yesterday's Question Is....

TIMMY!!
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I guess that was an easy one, huh? Congrats to Shannon and Nique (and anyone else who guessed correctly in their head) for getting the correct answer. ;) The story is that Timmy fished out his old snow boots the other day and it appears that he likes to wear them when he is playing outside. However, I will not - I repeat - I will NOT let him wear them anywhere else, but right out front of our house.

Our neighbors already know that we're a strange family, but we can't have anyone else think that too....

Monday, June 18, 2007

Just What Every Child Needs....

A tattoo kit!?


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All I can say if it were my boys, they'd try give each other tattoos like this:

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And this...

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All the kids would next is a self-piercing kit and a bail money piggybank!

Since My Mom Won't Buy Me Crocs...

Can you guess which one of my children was sporting these lovely pair of snow boots on a day that was 85 degrees?

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Answer Will Be Posted Later!

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Our Father's Day Card To The Weener-Dad....

Some of you may know that my hubby is kind of a comic book geek. I thought he may appreciate this 'card' I made him...I hope he likes it!

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HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO ALL OF THE DADS OUT THERE!!

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Happy Birthday Timmy!!

Today is Timmy's birthday. He's 7-years-old today...SEVEN!

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Things to know about Timmy....

1. He loves to cuddle and will still give me hugs and kisses without a fight.

2. He is very good in math. He loves to play with numbers.

3. He is the neighborhood Pokemon godfather. The neighborhood kids always want him to show them new stuff on the Pokemon DS games.

4. He is very shy and suffers from a little bit of anxiety when introduced to new situations.

5. He is a reformed boogie picker/eater.

6. He will be in second grade next year.

7. He loves to hide his dirty socks....still....

8. His favorite food is lasagna.

9. He is very flexible and can do a split without twisting his torso.

10. He is loved very much.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Weenerm0m's Question Of The Day....

Do you think this family looks back at this picture and asks themselves, "What the hell were we thinking?"?

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Here's another question. Is the kid a boy or a girl?

(And for those wondering...NO! It's not MY family because back in the day I'd never go out without my blue eyeliner.)

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Other People's Kids...

I've been debating on whether or not I should post this because I don't want to come out of this post looking like a grumpy, old woman. Against my better judgement, however, I'm just going to let the old hag that is dormant in my body come out....

Let me start off by saying that I know my kids are no angels. I don't have them on any "My kids are better than everyone else's" pedestal and I'm sure my kids are guilty of some things that annoys other kid's parents.

Chapter I -

The Refridgerator Raiders (Otherwise known as the Gremlin Syndrome) ...

Normally you don't mind feeding the other people's kids that come over to play with your own kids. You give them a snack every now and then. Usually they don't even have to ask for something to eat...you just give it to them from the bottom of your "I want to be a cool mom" heart. However, the Refridgerator Raiders are different. As soon as these kids come over to play with your kids they make it known that they are 'dying' from hunger. Apparently the hunger pains hit them as soon as they enter the door to your house. It usually starts out innocent with a slice of watermelon one day and a fudgesicle the next, but before you know it they hint at the chips and cookies and popsicles and grapes and carrot sticks and cheese...etc... that are in your house.

The funny part is that you know that they're parents actually do feed them.

Solution:
  1. You can tell them no when they ask if they can have that banana (which btw is the last one and you had your eye on it yourself.).
  2. You can lie and say you don't have anything to give them to eat.
  3. You can purposely NOT have anything to eat just to spite him/her.
  4. You can tell them to go home and ask their parents for something to eat.
  5. You can move.
Chapter II

The Spend-The-Night Knights...

You know it's coming by the whispers and the plotting that is going on around you. You also know it's going to be asked because a couple of minutes after the other people's kid came over, s/he asks your kid, "Do you want me to spend the night?" You hold your breath and just keep acting as if you can't hear a lick of what they are mumbling to each other. So you sit and wait for the moment that the question will be asked. Now mind you that it's the start of the weekend and all you want do is relax. As a matter of fact, the other people's kid spent the night last weekend too...so now they was a repeat of last weekend? You already know that you are going to say 'no' to the sleepover, but you know you are going to have a battle once the other people's kid informs your kid that their mom already said that s/he can spend the night at your house. (Which drives me batty!) Oh and also watch out because these kids will often have backup plans for spending the night at some other other peoples kid's home. This is most likely result in your kid having a major meltdown when you say no.

Solution:
  1. You can put on some earplugs, say "No, not this weekend." and book out of the room.
  2. You can say, "You can't sleep over here, but 'insert your own kid's name' can spend the night at your house!"
  3. You can just mention something about the boogie man that lives in your closet and who seems to only come out when your kids have friends over for the night.
  4. You can move.
Chapter III
The Ding-Dongers ( can also be known as the Knock-Knock-Knockers)....

Finally - a moment of peace! Your kids are outside playing with the other people's kids. With the baby taking a nap, you have some time to just sit down and relax with some vanilla yogurt* and an old episode of 90210 that is playing on some random cable channel. Just as you are about to witness Brenda lose her virginity to Dylan...your doorbell rings. Wouldn't you know - it's your friendly neighborhood Ding-Donger! Once you become quite familiar with the Ding-Donger, you don't answer the door with a 'hello' but rather with a "What did he (meaning your own kid) do now?"

The Ding-Donger loves to tell you EVERYTHING that your own kids have said/did/chant that s/he is not happy about. Whether it be that your kid didn't give him/her a turn while playing kickball or that your kid was making cross-eyes while crossing the street. At first you may take it personally and think that you must have some bad kid, however, you re-think that once you get that 50th ringing of the doorbell for the day. It's also reassuring to you when you see that your doorbell isn't the only one the Ding-Donger love to ring. Apparently this kid has issues with all of the other-other people's kids in the neighborhood too.

*Make sure you are out of sight from the Refridgerator Raiders.


Solution:
  1. You can just go along with the Ding-Donger and listen to whatever predicament s/he has at that moment.
  2. You can disassemble your doorbell, but then the Ding-Donger will become a Knock-Knock-Knocker which btw can be even more annoying than the ding donging of the doorbell.
  3. You can put a tattle box on the porch and just have the Ding-Donger write down all of his/her issues.
  4. You can move.
to be continued....

Raising Up My Potato Radio....

Mr. Wizard was the first person to make science not only fun, but cool too. He'd make cereal explode and do things with mayonaise jars that I never thought possible...

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And how can you forget the opening credits?



Peace out Mr. Wizard!

Friday, June 08, 2007

CAUGHT...!

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Crime(s):

(1)Neglecting Blog
(2)Blog-Reader Endangerment
(3) ......... Abuse

Doing my best Paris Hilton mugshot impersonation...
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Oh and I can't forget one of my favorite mugshots ever...
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Guess you better add "Bad Impersonations" to my list of crimes too.....

Friday, June 01, 2007

HaPpY bIrThDaY sWeEtIe!!

Today the love of my life...my soulmate...the father of my three weeners....is turning thirty-something today.

And I - being the good wife that I am - will be going out in like twenty minutes to get him something for his birthday. Yeah...I'm last-minute-louie, but that is only one of the many reasons why he loves me. You see not only is the calendar aging him, but being married to ME is aging him as well.

One of these days the calendar will catch up with me....