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I'm a wife and mom to three boys. I love everything 80's, anything chocolate and loathes politics. I like to run for fun (preferably NOT in the hot, hot sun)....

Monday, October 16, 2006

Rub-A-Dub-Dub...Some Poop In The Tub...

Date: October 15, 2006
Time: Somewhere between 6:30 pm and 7:00 p.m.
Location: The Weener-Boys' Bathroom

The story begins as Mother Weener puts the littlest weener in the bathtub for his nightly bath...

Mason: (Holding up an Elmo figure) Ehhhh?

Me: What do you got there? Is that Elmo? (begins to wave) Hi Elmo!

Mason: (Still holding up Elmo up) Ehhhh?!

Me: Hi Elmo!

Enter the stage right (READ: the bathroom door) the middle weener.

Timmy: Hey mom can we read this Biscuit book together?

Me: Sure...Let me finish giving Mason a bath.

Timmy: (with a huge pout on face) Aww....I want to read it now...PUH-LEASSSE?

Me: (Looks at Timmy's sad look and then at Mason playing in the bathtub.)

Timmy: Come on Mom. Mason is just playing with his Elmo and Ernie boat.

Mason: (holding up an Ernie figure this time) Ehhhh?!

Me: (looking at the orange figure) Who is that? Is that Ernie? (Waving) Hi Ernie!

Timmy: Pleasssse?

Me: (Watches as Mason bangs both Elmo and Ernie together) Alright...I'll watch Mason and read with you. (Begins to sit on the closed toilet) Come sit on my lap.

Timmy: Yay!

Mason: (Holding up both Ernie and Elmo) Ehhhhh? Ehhhhh?

So Timmy and his mother start to read the book in the bathroom as Mason plays in the tub. Every once in a while Mason holds up a toy and says "Ehhhhh?". However, somewhere between all of the "Ehhhhh's" something did not seem right to mother. Mother noticed that Mason - who had a humongous smile on his face - was holding an object she had never had seen before. She couldn't make out what toy that could be, but she did know one thing.... It was brown..

Me: (Bringing the book down to her knees) Hmmmm?

Timmy: Hey I was reading that!

Me: (Thinking out loud to herself) I don't think we have any brown toys for the bathtub....What brown toy...

In mid sentence Mother jumps up and looks inside the tub. Oh the HORROR! Mixed in between Ernie and Elmo were these brown things....brown things that were floating!

Me: (Frantically grabs a towel to get the owner of the turds - who is laughing by the way - out of the tub.) Oh no! Mason pooped in the tub!

Timmy: (With finger in his nose) That is disgusting!

Me: (Points to the door) Timmy! Go get your father...right now!

Scene ends with father coming to take the smallest weener so mother could clean all of the crap - literally - out of the tub.

The End


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